# How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less ## Metadata * Author: [Nicholas Boothman](https://www.amazon.comundefined) * ASIN: B001BAJ2B6 * Reference: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B001BAJ2B6 * [Kindle link](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B001BAJ2B6) ## Highlights Irresistible Language Patterns — location: [98](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B001BAJ2B6&location=98) ^ref-7442 --- Likable people give loud and clear signals of their willingness to be sociable; they reveal that their public communication channels are open. Embedded in these signals is evidence of self-confidence, sincerity and trust. Likable people expose a warm, easygoing public face with — location: [176](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B001BAJ2B6&location=176) ^ref-12253 --- outgoing radiance that states, “I am ready to connect. I am open for business.” They are welcoming and friendly, and they get other people’s attention. — location: [178](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B001BAJ2B6&location=178) ^ref-33303 --- 1) your presence, i.e., what you look like and how you move; 2) your attitude, i.e., what you say, how you say it and how interesting you are; and 3) how you make people feel. — location: [198](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B001BAJ2B6&location=198) ^ref-6986 --- Greetings are broken into five parts: Open—Eye—Beam—Hi!—Lean. — location: [219](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B001BAJ2B6&location=219) ^ref-28232 --- Keep your heart aimed directly at the person you’re meeting. Don’t cover your heart with your hands or arms and, when possible, unbutton your jacket or coat. — location: [223](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B001BAJ2B6&location=223) ^ref-30795 --- Incidentally, the “hands-free” handshake works wonders in presentations when you want to establish rapport with a group or audience. — location: [249](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B001BAJ2B6&location=249) ^ref-61963 --- An Exercise in Greeting Firing Energy — location: [251](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B001BAJ2B6&location=251) ^ref-50186 --- As you meet and greet new people, your ability to establish rapport will depend on four things: your attitude, your ability to “synchronize” certain aspects of behavior like body language and voice tone, your conversation skills and your ability to discover which sense (Visual, Auditory or Kinesthetic) the other person relies on most. — location: [278](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B001BAJ2B6&location=278) ^ref-22705 --- People who are low on communication skills usually have not thought out the response they want from the other person in the first place and therefore cannot aim for it. — location: [297](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B001BAJ2B6&location=297) ^ref-17817 --- The key to establishing rapport with strangers is to learn how to become like them. Fortunately, this is both very simple and a lot of fun to do. It allows you to look on each new encounter as a puzzle, a game, a joy. Rapport by Design When the interests or the behavior of two or more people are synchronized, these people are said to be in rapport. — location: [377](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B001BAJ2B6&location=377) ^ref-30929 --- Remember, the “K” in “KFC” stands for “Know what you want.” If you don’t know what you want, there’s no message to deliver and no basis for connecting with other people. — location: [441](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B001BAJ2B6&location=441) ^ref-11401 --- In face-to-face situations, your attitude precedes you. It is the central force in your life—it controls the quality and appearance of everything you do. — location: [466](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B001BAJ2B6&location=466) ^ref-14424 --- Your body doesn’t know how to lie. Unconsciously, with no directions from you, it transmits your thoughts and feelings in a language of its own to the bodies of other people, and these bodies understand the language perfectly. Any contradictions in the language can interrupt the development of rapport. — location: [560](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B001BAJ2B6&location=560) ^ref-8818 --- When you meet someone new, immediately point your heart warmly at that person’s heart. There is magic in this. — location: [569](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B001BAJ2B6&location=569) ^ref-23884 --- Make sure that your words, your tonality and your gestures are all saying the same thing. Be on the lookout for incongruity in others. Notice how it makes you feel. We’ve all seen those old movies — location: [639](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B001BAJ2B6&location=639) ^ref-20417 --- Don’t try too hard! In a study conducted at Princeton University, students of both sexes were questioned about their methods of sizing up people they met for the first time. Overeagerness was one of the most reported turnoffs. Don’t smile too hard, don’t try to be too witty, don’t be overpolite and avoid the temptation to be patronizing. — location: [702](kindle://book?action=open&asin=B001BAJ2B6&location=702) ^ref-25896 ---